stuck

In this game of life, I struggle most of all with myself.  I am in my head too much, get in my way too often. I have goals with no clear path of how to get there, and I spend too much time beating myself up over what isn't done rather than for what has been.
Big man is also in his head, but it is way more fun there. He obsesses over the perfect optical illusion for the haunted house (Yes....there will be one) or what role he might play in the most recent spy novel he is reading.  People marvel at that fact that he reads with his job taking up so much of his time. When he is not creating some funky piece of art that is billed as a "family project" or building a homemade cider press out of Menard's clearance items, he reads almost as incessantly as I do because there are ideas lurking in books. 
The difference between us is he thinks, "Why not?" and I think, "How?" I want the unknowns answered before I start much of anything.  He just jumps in, my renaissance man, without much fear and with faith that no matter what happens, it's no big deal. And in the end, that sort of attitude is the biggest deal because it allows you an ease that doesn't weigh you down with the particulars. It enables the toughest part of anything to happen...the getting started part.
So if you have been wondering what I have been up to, the short answer is, "I've been getting in my way."  
I do feel myself moving, but feel free to give me a push to speed up the process.





3 comments:

  1. I am an introvert. Actually used to be terribly shy. And mostly I still am. But someone once told me that if you want to be something (like less shy) then just pretend like you already are that. If you want to be thin, pretend like you're a thin person. Act like a thin person. If you want to be social, pretend you are social, pretend you're not shy, act like you would if you weren't shy. Basically fake it until you make. So if you're in your own way and stuck, pretend like you aren't. Pretend like you're someone who is overflowing with confidence and a belief in yourself. ACT like you're someone who believes in you. Pretend like you feel the way that the rest of us do about you... that you're smart and informed and entertaining and interesting and talented.

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  2. Lisa - love this! Nate is the dreamer and I'm the practical dream killer! Whenever he heads out on a solo run, I know I'm in trouble because he'll come home with a 100 "plans" in his head - starting a brewery, buying land, renting canoes, opening a restaurant - putting all of them together in a "brew pub/canoe rental/fine dining/lodge" sort of place!?! My practicality lets me entertain the ideas for a fraction of a second before I start asking all the "how" questions. :) It's my belief that he needs someone grounded like me and I need a dreamer like him to balance out.

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  3. Go to the children's section of the store and read Oh The Places You'll Go.

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